1970 : 1971 :1972 : 1973 : 1974 : 1975 : 1976 : 1977 : 1978 : 1979

Ministry and Colliche

FIENDS [SIC], STUDENTS & SWANSEA UNIVERSITY COLLEGE INHABITANTS,

HERE IS AN OFFICIOUS ANNOUNCEMENT FROM “THE MINISTRY OF ANTISOCIAL INSECURITY”. FOR THE NEXT TWO DAYS YOU WILL BE REQUIRED AND REQUESTED TO TAKE PART IN A CO-OPERATIVE WRITING AND DOCUMENTATION PROJECT. THE BRIDGE OF THE RIVER WYE, WHERE COSEY FANNY TUTTI WILL BE SAT AT A TABLE WITH VARIOUS FORMS AND APPEALS FOR YOU TO FILL IN YOURSELVES. YOU CAN DRAW ON THEM, WRITE ON THEM, STICK PICTURES ON THEM. IN RETURN FOR SIGNING-ON AND SPENDING SOME OF YOUR VALUABLE TIME IN THIS POINTLESS PURSUIT YOU WILL RECEIVE A PAY SLIP THAT CAN BE CASHED IN AT A TIME TO BE ANNOUNCED, AND A SIGNING – ON CARD TO IDENTIFY YOU FOR LATER ACTIVITIES.
YOU WILL ALSO EVENTUALLY HAVE COUMTRIBUTED [SIC] THREE PAGES TO A BOOK FOR PUBLICATION & YOUR NAME WILL BE IN PRINT. Yippee at last you’re famoush [sic] slush

COLLICHE PASTAGE: IS AGAIN SPECIALLY COUMCEIVED [SIC] FOR YOU ALONE TO BE FILM STARS AND PHOTOGRAPHIC, EVEN PORNOGRAPHIC IF YOU WISH, STARLETS. 150 PEOPLE WILL BE GIVEN BADGES. SOME WILL REQUIRE SPECAL ATTENTION, SOME WILL BE PICABIANS. A VERY STRANGE RACE OF PEOPLE, DEDICATED TO THE ABSURD. SOMETIMES YOU MAY BE ASKED TO GO TO A PARTICUAR SPOT TO BE FILMED OR PHOTOGRAPHED. YOU CAN CHOOSE WHEHTER TO DO SO OR NOT. SOMETIMES ALL SPECIAL ATTENTION CASES WILL BE SUMMONSED [SIC] BY THE ANONOMOUS [SIC] POWERS THAT COUMTROL [SIC] US, SOMETIMES YOU WILL BE ASKED TO GO WITH A NICE MESSANGER [SIC], HE WILL BE EASILY RECOGNISABLE, OFTEN ON ROLLER SKATES.
PLEASE DO COUM [SIC] ALONG AND BE FOREVER RECORDED AND DISTRIBUTED TO FILES AND MAGAZINES AND FAMILY ALBUMS ALL OVER THE GLOBE. GLOBAL INFANTILISM TAKE ONE SMALL CRAWL FOR A BABY, ONE HUGE DRIBBLE FOR MANKIND.

THE BANANA BANK: :--: 3 oh yes 4 THIS IS A PROJECT TOTALLY DEPENDANT ON YOU FOR A STRANGE WOMAN IN CANADADA [SIC] CALLED ANNA BANANA, WHO COLLECTTS AND COLLATES ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO DO WITH A THEME OF BANANAS. ANY CUTTINGS YO CAN FIND, ANY PICTURES, DRAWINGS, CARTOONS, IDEAS, OBJECTS, THOUGHTS TO DO WITH BANANAS, PLEASE DELIVER TO THE MINISTERIAL SECREATRY, OR FIZZY PEAT THE ROLLER SKATING BUTLER/ CLOWN, OR EVEN IF YOU ARE DESPARATE TO THE OTHER ONE WHO LOKKS DAFT & IS TOO SERIOUS. oh him. THEY WILL BE COLLECTED IN A BOX AND SENT TO CANADADA FOR A BOOK BEING PUBLISHED ON YES, YOU GUESSED IT, BANANANANANAS. A BANANA EATING PHOTO COUMPETITION [SIC] IS ALSO OPEN TO ENTRIES. WE CAN GIVE YOU THE ADDRESS TO SEND THEM TO IF YOU CANNOT GET THEM READY IN TIME. ON TUESDAY NIGHT A PRIZE, VALUELESS, A PHOTO, PRICELESS, WILL BE AWARDED TO WHOEVER PRODCES THE BEST PIECE OF BANANA FOOLISHNESS OF THE TWO DAYS, (tue nues another time)

HOMAGE TO THE BRITISH WORKER: MORE REACTIONARY THAN ANY PRIME MINISTER, UN SPORTING, UN INSPIRING, NOT POLITICALLY MOTIVATED, UNHIP... YOU PROBABLY WONT EVEN EVER NOTICE IT, PERHAPS IT WILL COUM TO YOU.
SO WE WANT YOU TO WRITE A BOOK, ITS VERY EASY, TO MAKE A FILM, BE A MODEL, SUPPLY US WITH BANANA IMAGES, MAYBE EVEN HAVE A GOOD GIGGLE.

["Fiends, Students & Swansea University College Inhabitants" - leaflet]